Hollow

Im tired. At this state of perception, nothing perceived is believable. Secluded in this spectrum of vacuum space, unable to diversified, unable to diverge to any direction. Its a circle of momentum which you are standing afloat in the middle , being the interception point for everything . Im tired for now. Its hollow. And when im tired, il turn to ones whom comforts me. Being a little child at heart ;*(



Song for the day, loving the rhythm ;)

Bangkok~

Abandon blog, time to have a little update~

First time setting foot at Bangkok, yes, indeed a little backdated..had always wanted to be here for its shopping adventure as much i have heard. Three weeks of working days ... hopefully lots of shopping time and wandering around the city ... must must not procrastinate like i always do... yet, its been raining days since the day i've set foot here, rainy thunder stormy night tonight , again.....awaiting to finish all work and its off to Moscow .

Been a busy 1 year of travelling and gets a little tiresome, nevertheless loving the adaptation to getting out from comfort zone. At times, it is just concluded characteristics of many whom have the need to comfort themselves in familiarity in life to give them an assurance which they thought they need. Comforting for the time being, but it is when you start experiencing a whole different scope of familiarity, you would then yearn to have a change. When comparison of a new 'familiarization' to the old is put on the table, evaluation for everything better or to just have faith that you already had the best of everything. Changes, simple sense in it that accumulate is capable to make big changes . To always ask oneself, what changes do you want? What worthy changes do you need?

Little Time

 Much had been said and done in a mth since back to home . Good and bad, eventually sums up to a bad ending with good beginning ahead. Time to expedite movement of  ' checklist' crossings in 3 weeks before leaving to F-rica . Much to do in litttle time. Unsatisfying to leave something unsettled ......

Secluded comfort

Confined in a space of happiness, with secluded comfort . Happiness , is remedial for  fear, pain, sadness and anger. Awkwardly, the sight of eyes recognizes happiness easier compared to the dark synonyms that plays along with it. Often, when happiness involves the role of the vain heart, it is fragile. It is unheard, as it only can be greatly felt emotionally. This confined space of happiness is now an addiction to the soul, yet it bears so much fear. Foreseeable, a drop of tear would not portray its impact, it is the fear of tears. Where to no avail, the vain heart is patient with abundant hope to dwell in this given condition. The daunting to strive further as time pass day by day. Yet, for how long……to dwell without thinking about consequences.

Light up…when you do not know how to fight :)

Witty song with casual attractions ...favourite :*)

Persona of Senses

Sense of perfection , sense of satisfaction , sense of security

Sense of perfection derived conclusively when you obtained perfection , noted that only in you view of perfection , as the verb 'perfection' in fact does not exist. Why so? Perfection do not exist in anything.. nothing is symmetrically perfect in nature. Hence, individuality perfection is rather obtaining sense of satisfaction in you own form. Often my definition of perfection i have drawn for myself is far from perfection. Due to the fact that i am easily satisfied, in certain matters to be specific.

Thus, satisfaction concludes to security. An understanding of basic life limitations where sense of security is put in place. Whereby, when I am satisfied of the perfection I have in mind, I would feel secured. As simple as that, as usual, I detest complications. Why complicate when you can have the simplest form of understanding not involving negative outcome of complications.

As much as I would have written simple verbs and the real outline of story.... I am just using metaphor to express my thoughts for the above. Metaphor that implied to everything instead of that one story line.....

Venezuela~

Fast lane as time flies unintended in Venezuela, the rainy moody tropical weather of hot and cold had made the days pass slow. A week more for completion and its holiday for real, not that coming here isnt a sort of holiday, but its an assigned work-holiday, hence it does not give the  freedom of just-holiday mood . Nevertheless, I will be  missing the friendly and accommodating people I know here.

Awaiting for the exit meeting and off to main city of Venezuala, Caracas and Paris for a real holiday ....last but not least, home sweet home which im pretty much excited. It has always been weird how much I longed for trips abroad when Im back home ,but yet easily feel homesick when im away from my loved ones....undeniably indecisive characteristics =) or maybe it was just the missing thoughts of ones I loved.

Decided to document my laidback half a month lifestyle at the small town of Maturin as Im not a fan of taking pictures of every single 'atom/particle' I see, but rather documenting it in words seems more interesting for me. A sedentary and different lifestyle here, relaxing. A place that I would longed to live in upon retirement  ...."retirement" in the sense whereby when you have seen all you have wanted to see in live, whereby when you have heard all you have wanted to hear, whereby you have experience all you have not known and hence, a relaxing lifestyle.

The diversity of culture here is interesting with mainly Spanish, Portugese  and surprisingly Indians. A rather poor city of Maturin with graffiti paintings all over is not a city of tourist destination. An amounted of 20 police cars in total in this Maturin town to cater safety assurance of thousands of residents nevertheless ridiculous. A city that speaks no English is real hard to be living in if you cant speak the native Espanol. Sight of the poor ones in the streets gave a sense of appreciation to the life you had , many may feel how inadequate the lifestyle they had now but its rather different when you have seen the unlucky ones with much more thankfulness in life. To be one whom is blessed over a meal they had for the day is worthy to life compared to ones whom feel "blessed" over luxuries of branded materialistic of life.

To be honest, everyone which includes me have had that luxury dreams of gaining every superficial achievement of lives, an undefined monetary value , an undefined satisfaction to everything beautiful to mankind....because we had seen the sight of things we wanted. To be walking in the exclusive luxury streets of Dubai and passing by the poor streets of Maturin is a different experience as a whole.

Yet, a turn-around thoughts also gave a different view of needs to achieve....be ever achieving in all dreams of life yet appreciative of everything you hold.

Before you start complaining about the party you cant attend, think about the working labourer who cant attend his loved family's funeral since he had no money to return to his home town ...

Before you start complaining about how unlucky you are to be working overtime, think about the about to due pregnant lady walking in the streets selling food just to sufficiently provide daily meal for her other kids...

Realised that I have written a sentimental preaching post all of the sudden=p

To how deep you dream, you can achieved
To how much you need, you would get
To how much you love, you would be loved
To how much you appreciated, you would be blessed

Jakarta~

A moment to dribble a few thoughts here having a relaxing day on a comfy bed reviving the long lost bloggie. Days in Jakarta are passing by slow this time. Sight of the beautiful busy city at the tip of my curtain is influencing me to not step out of the room to roam round the center of city. And of coz accompanied by the best thoughts thats daunting me=)

"A girl is happiest when she knows you make her your everything...in front of everyone, all the time".